October 14, 2008

Misery Of The Foolish Mind

It’s a tragedy of my life that God didn’t provide me with enough brains to save myself from being fooled all through my childhood. Though my mom recalls that part of my life as being the naughtiest phase of my life, I completely differ on her opinion. I guess its just to cover up on her conduct towards me that she labels me as the naughtiest and the strangest baby ever born. Life’s a pain when old memories remind me how an innocent mind was so easily fooled at home. One such excerpt from my pitiful childhood is worth mentioning.

When I was around five years old I had developed quite a questioning mind to serve as a headache for my parents, as if my constant jabbering wasn’t enough! One fine day when my mom and I were going through our family album I came across one picture clicked in Mussoorie with my mother holding me while trying to make me stand in the water. The weird expression on my face caught my inquisitive eye and hence popped a question from an impressionable mind. “Why are you holding me like this Mama?” Already fed up of the ‘Whys’ in the previous pictures, bang came the reply, “That’s where your father and I found u and got you home. You are not my baby we found you in the river!”

Before she could add more to the new revelation, she observed my lips curl down and my eyes started watering. Not being able to see the twinkle in my mom’s eyes and her joy of having surprised a harmless little me, I was left dumbstruck. Since childhood the uneasiness of being caught crying in front of someone else made me feel like running away from the couch and get to the solace of the familiar dingy place under the bed. Closing the album the next instant I said, “Enough for today!” and ran away from my mom.

Supposedly that incident was forgotten by the members of the family but not poor me. But the incident resurfaced once again after a lot many months and that too in front of a guest who might have quite enjoyed my misery. Somehow people have this inexplicable joy in receiving an answer for the silly question, “Are you your Dad’s daughter or your Mama’s?” Isn’t the answer quite obvious in most cases? As far as my knowledge favors me it takes two to create a fool like me. But after the new found information quick came the reply, “I’m nobody’s daughter, my parents picked me up from a river!” To my mother’s horror probably the scene flashed back and she snapped at me “What in the Lord’s name are you saying?” The innocent in me just poured out the whole incident in the presence of every person present in the room. It took more than a day to convince me that I was not adopted. Since the damage showed its after effects at later stages in life too causing a major embarrassment for my parents, many more served as a witness to my misconception. Hence making me famous as the girl who thought she was “Adopted”.