O My God!

Remember that couple that was trying to conceive a baby to kill the demon next door? The demon that was creating havoc in the city for the past decade? Yeah! They finally decided to have a baby to kill him. Similar to how we get lazy when there’s a fire in the house and wait for the rains to put it out. That’s exactly what I’m talking about. Was breezing through some of the Hindu mythologies today. I’m sure they have plenty of metaphors that got lost in translation over years while a bunch of dunces translated them from one language to another. The Chinese whisper ended up creating far more ridiculous stories that make Immaculate Conception look real! And now all that’s left of them is larger than life characters whom we can blame for every puddle of shit that we end up stepping in.

This post is not an intention of hurting any religious sentiment but just an attempt of reasoning and questioning. Had to insert that line before I get dragged to the court of justice. India is a free country after all. Any citizen is free to drag me to the court for what I write in my personal space here. And they can practice this right very shamelessly. So, not taking any chances.

Now, coming back to my question of the day. Why did gods have to reproduce individuals for objectives like killing demons and monsters? Why couldn’t they do it on their own? Taking the example of Kumar Sambhava, poor Kartikeya had to be born and trained by Shiva to kill TarakaSura. Logically, it looks extremely stupid that the gods deemed it fine for people on earth and heaven to keep suffering till they felt a need to kill this Asura and finally conspired with everything possible to get Kartikeya to finally take birth and kill him. I can’t even come up with words to describe how ludicrous this entire idea seems to me. It all started with Shiva meditating on the top of Kailasa minding his own business. Kamadeva, the Indian cupid went and messed with his affairs with his nosy arrows and brought upon himself the wrath of an individual who’s famous for his anger. Should I call that utter stupidity or reckless behaviour? Nevertheless, at the cost of Kamadeva’s life, Parvathi and Shiva unite to give birth to the God of War, Kartikeya.

My question: Why couldn’t Shiva ‘The Destroyer’ kill this Taraka guy himself? Why did the gods have to wait till the complex birth (that’s another story!) of this war kid, wait for him to grow up (which did not happen overnight), get trained by his dad and then finally proceed towards his objective in life? Apparently, some very smart God had endowed this Taraka guy with a boon that only Shiva’s son could kill him. Ha! Technicalities. Hindu mythology always comes up with excuses to have kids. No wonder our population is bursting at the seams. Not just that. The kids are born knowing why they are born. If only I was lucky enough to know the reason of my existence. Gods conceive kids to kill demons. Regular people have kids to kill time and I’m fulfilling every bit of that objective. Boons and curses were like tragic decisions made by the top management. Who in their right mind will endow a ‘Demon’ with powers that no god can handle? Very similar to reckless inventions of the present day.

After reading so much about Shiva and Parvathi alone, my knowledge about conceiving a child has theoretically been ameliorated. According to what I’ve read, kids can be born out of body dirt, hair strands and all other parts that have no contribution towards the actual act. I’m not letting another guy near me till I am ready to mother a child. Don’t want kids taking birth every time I sneeze, get angry or sweat. And the Indian government is providing me no privileges apart from the rising inflation. Nevertheless, these stories do have enough chutzpah to challenge your logic. I would suggest keeping that aside and trying to pacify your left-side brain by constantly assuring it that it’s just a story and nothing more. There can be as many temples and worshippers of these deities all across the world that manage to give a substantial number of people enough hope to fight with their demons. In the end, I guess that’s all that counts. Probably, these ridiculous stories have managed to keep the child inside satisfied with a hope that many of us have lost. The longing for a better day that many have started losing and the numbers are just getting larger. Probably, another demon in the making.